Resolve to Rely

So I've had this blog for a little (very little) over a year now... and I only made 7 posts!!! As suspected from the beginning, I'm not a good blogger. Most likely, you read many interesting, funny, and witty blogs every day. Well... Allow me to be your source of boringness.

I started a blog post a couple weeks (or was it months?) ago, but I was too tired at that moment to actually make it a real post so I just jotted some notes and a copy of a conversation I had with my boyfriend. I meant to finish it in the next day or so, but end-of-semester demands are quite.... demanding. Then with all the Christmas traveling and festivities, I haven't had a chance to... or at least, that's my excuse.

So here it is...

Ok... well I was having some difficulties with school and I was trying to fix things and figure things out on my own, worrying about them and the like... when ...

My devotional said something to the effect that when things build up, God is seeing what our reaction will be and if we turn to him for help or just try and do it all on our own........i usually do the latter

I then was talking about this with my boyfriend... mentioning how I usually try to do things on my own until I fail and give up... then I turn to God. Andrew challenged me to stop before failing (i think i was on the verge) and turn to God first. Before, I was complaining about my troubles... and he said to let God handle them... and I responded with...

i actually thought about that - it's funny you should mention that. the thought danced quickly through my mind amidst my worries - "if things were all easy i wouldn't need faith - i should just rest and let him handle this"

the thought was too fleeting. but thanks for bring it back! it is easier said than done.

A:how easily it is to forget.........i hate that

A:prone to wander

Then I remembered something from my class at school that day. We were talking about lesson plans and teaching hygiene in schools and adult groups...

it's like our lesson today in class- positive reinforcement and negative consequences- we give negative consequences so that a bad behavior becomes extinct - but sometimes it takes multiple consequences for the same behavior before someone learns

that's what my instructor said and i thought about how frustrated i would be with myself if i was God!!!

I suppose my New Year's Resolution will be to let the bad behavior-- not relying on God-- become extinct. Wish my luck!